I'm in "like" with him!

day 77: Happy Anniversary honey!

how we met: In the fall of '92 I took a position as a customer service representative at the Off*ice Wo*rks in Lan*caster. At the time I had been dating someone for 2 years, but things were not going well and our relationship ended a few months into my new job.

Phil was the accounting manage at the office, and pass my department numerous times to get a cup of coffee. I thought he was good-looking in his suite pants, neatly pressed white shirts and tie, but I wasn't interested at the time and began to wonder if he had a caffeine addiction.

A few months and 1,000 cups of coffee later, I started to ask around about his age and dating status and quickly found out that he wouldn't date anyone from work because of being in a mangers position. Little did I know that he was doing his own investigation on me! With a quick check of the payroll records, he quickly found out that I was only 19. The almost 7 years separating our ages seemed too many to think seriously about dating me for him.

He had taken the purchasing manager (who's office was opposite of mine, MARRIED and a friend I knew from church) to lunch one day while her car was in the shop for repairs. I must have been in a bold mood (or in "like") because before I could stop myself I was asking, "So when do I get to have lunch with you?" At that moment I just wanted to melt into my chair. What was I thinking??

He smiled and said, "Well, whenever your car is in the shop for repair let me know." Was that an invitation or just something to say in an awkward moment? My car went into the repair shop the following week! ;-) And yes he was true to his words.

Our friendship developed through talks on his way to and from the coffee machine and Friday lunch "dates". Well he may not have called them a "date", but I sure did. I was starting to "fall" for him. At this point, he still was not too sure about wanting to date someone at work and had decided that if we were going to date, I would have to ask him. However he didn't communicate that to me and I couldn't figure out why he would not ask me out other than for a Friday lunch.

getting serious: One Friday morning my boss offered me two tickets to a Phillie's' game for that Saturday night. I took them but had no idea what I was going to do with them. My co-works hounded me all day until I finally agreed to ask Phil. So at the end of the day, I got up enough nerve and walked into his office and asked him if he would like to go to the game with me. I hadn't given him any information as to when, but he said, "Yes" right away. I was floored and flattered all at the same time, but I thought he answered too quickly and I told him he could have some time to think about it before he gave me an answer. But he was sure he wanted to go and didn't need anymore time to think about it.

That is just one of the billions of reasons I fell in "like" with him that day - he had been thinking about me too and couldn't wait until I took the first step.

You will notice that I say "in like" with him and not "in love". Early in our relationship, maybe the 3rd date, I told him I "loved" him (I know . . way too soon!) before I left for the night. He didn't respond or say it back to me, he just said "have a good night". I cried the whole way home. The next day I asked him about it and he said, "I want to be SURE before I just say the words. I want you to know that I mean it when I say it to you."

I thought about his comment a lot and it challenged me to be more careful about using the word "love" so freely in a dating relationship. It's not just something we say because it's the next level of the relationship (according to the world). I pictured it this way: in my hands I hold a large paper heart. Every time I thought I was "in-love" with a boy and I got my heart broken, a piece was torn off. So eventually that whole paper heart was tattered and ripped - it wasn't complete. I wanted to be able to give the "love of my life - the right one" my entire, complete heart. So for almost 1 year, Phil and I were "in-like" with each other!

how we proposed: On August 6, 1994, the young adults from church went to Re*hobeth Beach, Deleware for the day. It was very cold and cloudy that day and I spent most of my time wrapped up in a blanket. The group decided to call it a day and go out for supper, but Phil talked me out of going with the group. Instead he wanted to go to the boardwalk with just me.

We drive to the boardwalk and park 2 1/2 blocks away! I kept telling him that I knew of some parking lots closer, but he wanted to walk a little before supper. So we walk - in the cold, windy evening with sunburned skin, no sweatshirts or long pants but it's okay because we're together. We reach the boardwalk and find a cute Victorian style restaurant and pop inside. He requested a table next to the window with a view of the beach and we were seated. The table had fresh flowers, a candle and a crisp white tablecloth. As the piano music played and I surveyed the crowd I was beginning to feel a tad under dressed.

We ordered our food and I tried to hold a conversation with him, but he seemed very distant and distracted. I didn't think much about it, we had a big day and sunburn always seem to drain your energy. But as the night went on, I felt something was wrong. Oh no, was this the end? Was he going to break up with me?

He asked if I wanted to take a walk with him. I nodded and tired to forget how cold I was. We didn't get very far until he said, "Let's head back to the car." I think that was the fasted I ever walked. I wanted to get be to the car and warm up! Half a block from the car (I could see the warmth!) he turned down a sand covered path that lead to the water. What was he doing!! I'm freezing here - I don't want to walk anymore I just want to be warm again! He stopped just at the edge of the steps and just pulled me into a hug. I soon forgot how cold I was :-)

I looked up at him and said, "The last time we were at the beach, you told me you loved me. Remember?"

"Yes. And this time I have something for you." he managed to say in a nervous voice. He asked me to become his wife and I said, "YES! oh Yes. Can we head back to the car so I can see the ring?"

We were married in '95 on a beautiful March morning! During the past 14 years, we have and ARE "IN -LOVE" and I can't wait for more great years to come!